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Welcome to the vocabulary lesson for obsessive behavior. Let’s get started.

In the headline we see the title, parents deny probable cause of son’s obsessive behavior.

To deny is to say something is wrong or you don’t believe it. So if you deny the cause, it means you won’t listen to the cause or you say the cause is wrong. That’s not the cause, that’s not the cause. You’re denying it, you’re saying no it’s not true, no it’s not true. That’s to deny. To deny.

Ok and then probable means, probable cause, you probably know probably; alright, that’s an adverb probably. But probable is the adjective. So probable cause means the likely cause, means it’s not a hundred percent but maybe, you know, ninety percent, or sure ninety percent that this is the cause.

Ok and then what are we talking about, the cause of what? We’re talking about the cause of their son’s obsessive behavior. So behavior’s how you act.

Obsessive, obsessive is to do something too much. You focus on only one thing. Now, it can be a verb, to obsess. To obsess means you focus on one thing and you think about it all the time.

For example, if I obsess about studying English it means every day I think about English, English, I wake up in the morning, I’m thinking about English. Must study English, must study English. At lunch time, I’m thinking about English, must study English, must study English. You only think about this, that’s the verb to obsess.

If you use it as an adjective, we say obsessive. So obsessive behavior means doing something all the time. For example, somebody washes their hands a lot, like every five minutes they wash their hands and then they touch something on a desk, they wash their hands again, then they touch a person they wash their hands again. They’re washing their hands, washing their hands, all the time. This is obsessive behavior. It’s doing one thing too much or all the time.

Ok and then in the first paragraph of the letter, woman says that her nephew has problems with obsessive hand-washing. That’s what I just described. Obsessive hand-washing means you wash your hands all the time, much too much. You’re always doing it again and again and again and again, obsessive hand-washing.

Nephew, what’s a nephew? A nephew is your sister’s son or your brother’s son. That’s a nephew. Ok so this nephew, he has obsessive hand-washing. He washes his hands much too much.

And then she says I think he needs professional help. He needs somebody to help him. I suspect means I think in this case. She strongly suspects that he suffers from obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). To suspect means to think, it means you’re not sure but you think probably this is happening.

And, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), it’s a kind of mental illness, mental sickness, where you constantly, always do something again and again. Hand-washing is a common example. But you’re always thinking about one thing and doing one thing.

Maybe this kid thinks about cleanliness, always wants to be clean and he always washes his hands. So if you do that too much if it’s really, really, too much, all the time, if it kind of crazy then we might say the person has obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).

Alright, then she said her brother and his wife refuse to believe their child has a problem. So again, refuse is a little bit like deny. Refuse means to say no, to say no to something.

Usually, when you refuse it’s because of a request. You say I won’t do something, right? Somebody wants you to do something but you won’t do it, you say no I won’t do it. That’s refuse, you refuse to do it. In this case they refuse to believe.

So usually refuse to do something, refuse to think something, refuse to believe something. Alright, so you deny a situation, you deny information but you refuse an action, that’s how they’re different.

Alright and then in the next sentence she says, “my nephew’s hands are chafed and raw”.

Chafed means very rough. It means if you rub your hands together, right? You’re rubbing your hands together very fast, together, together, rubbing together. If you do that a very, very, long time your hands will start to hurt, right? Your hands become red, maybe they get crack, maybe they start to bleed, right? It’s becomes painful if you do it too long. Well, that’s called chafed, chafed, it means your skin is hurt from rubbing, from moving against something else.

So it’s not like scratched, similar to scratched but scratched is usually like one line, right? Scratched with a knife, scratched with scissors, it’s one thin line. Chafed usually is a larger area, like a bigger area, like all of your hands can be chafed or part of your legs can be chafed. It’s rubbing against your pants maybe. And rubbing, rubbing the skin becomes red, the skin hurts a little bit. That’s… we call that chafed.

And sometimes we’ll say the skin is raw, the skin is raw, in this situation. And that again, that also means the skin is very red and painful. So chafed and raw are quite similar.

Ok and then she says that the boy’s parents reprimand him for his behavior, when he really needs help.

To reprimand is a little bit like criticizing but it’s a little different. When someone does something wrong, you reprimand them. So to reprimand means to tell somebody they did something wrong. So you say, “stop washing your hands so much. That’s bad”, ok? I reprimanded him.

Or maybe you steal money and then I tell you, “that’s bad. You stole the money. You should not do that” ok? I’m reprimanding you.

Reprimanding is different than punish. Punishing is you actually do something to the person but reprimand or to reprimand just means you say something, ok? It’s only talking. So that’s how reprimand and punishment are different.

Alright, and then finally last paragraph she says, “his mother’s the biggest problem. She nixes all issues that suggest to problem and my brother will not stand up to her”.

Ok. to nix (n i x), to nix something. To nix means to, it’s kind of like to destroy it, or eliminated it, or get rid of it. And usually it means somebody makes a suggestion and then you shoot the suggestion, right? We sometimes say shoot it down.

You immediately, you say, “no, this is not true, no we will not do it”. Ok, you’re nixing the idea, you are nixing the suggestion. You’re immediately saying no and denying it and refusing to do it, that’s to nix.

She nixes all issues that suggest a problem, it means she immediately and quickly says no. Anytime somebody says their son has a problem. So they say, “look I think your son might have a problem”, immediately she says no, he does not have a problem, absolutely not, there is no problem. That’s to nix, to immediately deny something, to immediately say no to any suggestion.

Ok, and finally she says her brother will not stand up to his wife.

To stand up to is a common phrase in English. To stand up to means to go against somebody. Maybe argue with them, maybe fight them. But, it means you will not be bullied, you won’t let somebody else push you around or make you do something.

If you stand up to someone it means somebody else is strong but you will go against them, you will disagree, you will tell them they’re wrong, that’s to stand up to somebody.

And we sometime use it in the negative. If you say, “he won’t stand up to his wife”, it means he always says yes to his wife. If his wife says, “wash the dishes now”, he will say, “yes, yes, ok”. And if she says “take out the garbage”, he says, “yes, yes, ok”. And if she says, “you’re stupid, you’re ugly”. He will say, “oh I’m sorry, I’m sorry”, right? He won’t stand up to her. He won’t go against her, he won’t argue with her, he won’t fight with her.

If he does fight with her, if she says, “you’re ugly and stupid” and then he says, “don’t call me ugly and stupid, don’t ever say that again, damn it”. Ok? Now he is standing up to her, right?

You can picture it in your head, to stand up to someone means you stand tall against them. They’re yelling at you. If you sit down and you put your head down, it means you’re very weak, but if you stand tall, face to face, then you’re also strong. So to stand up to someone means be strong against somebody else.

Alright, that is all the vocabulary for this lesson. Move on to the mini-story, thanks.